Concerning the undefined; on occasion, one may find oneself being tasked with an impossible task. Opening a portal to the inside of a Wonderball. Extracting the Omega 13 device with a stick of gum and a paperclip. Living at the center of the sun to overcome the negative effects of Kryptonite. Finding an assistant who can send a compressed imprint of a human brain through a microwave in the hopes of not turning a human into a gel-nana. Wait…
HOWEVER. Supposing the task can be accomplished in its impossibility, what fundamental right can prevent oneself from attempting such a feat?
As you, being a most astute reader of the highest caliber and only concerned with acquiring the juiciest bits of useless internet trivia which 1 Gigabit internet can consume, have no doubt already guessed, I speak of starting the trend of weekly Whimsical Wednesday posts with a post on Thursday. Some said it couldn’t be done. I’d have to wait until next week! The horrors of poor judgement would haunt me for at least 10 minutes, if not 11! At the very least, I couldn’t start a future scrolling marquee post with, “A long time ago, in a Whimsical Wednesday post several clicks away…”
As luck would have it, thoughts of crumbling under the pressure of fake deadlines and succumbing to the torture of accusatory misuse of named themes simply evade my subconscious and tickle my humerus. My outer eye remains calmly fixed on that glowing point just out of reach yet begging to distract me (you know, my monitor).
In case the audience has observed the exchange thus far and deemed my dedication lacking, please allow me to absolve these fears. In the spirit of Whimsical Wednesday, which really started on a Thursday because we thought of it too late, here is a token of resilient, irrefutable evidence that I shall press forward on a whim! For just 50 cents, payable by personal check, money order, carrier pidgeon, or the left big toe of your firstborn child, you can use your imagination to create a bloody effect on the red word!